Lost in Life.

I’m not sure where this post is going or what its even called.

(I assume the title above is fitting. But as I write this I have nothing planned)

Over the past day or so ive realised something about my self and my personality. Which is always dangerous to self criticise and evaluate yourself but I went there – and what I found made sense. It made me think about every past exploit and choice I’ve made.

My findings – I have no drive.

Wait what does that even mean. Now you are wondering. Where does he park his car? Or not. Sorry for the dad joke.

I mean Drive / Dedication / Motivation. So many times I have had an idea. Something new to look into. Usually job related. I do research and plans and then never go anywhere with it because I never follow it through.

The biggest one in my past is film making. I love it so much. I wanted to set up a production company and go freelance. All planned. Named. Cards printed. But just getting that umph to start it never appeared. Another example was setting up an etsy shop to sell Groomsmen gift boxes. Working out the costs and the realistic demand for it. But again after all that work put in – I did nothing with it.

Same again when it comes to writing scripts and even a children’s story book. I begin full of life and positivity and then let it fizzle out when it comes to commitment.

I think it boils down to a fear of the unknown. Leaving my stable reliable old job to take that plunge and go it alone. Risk that stability and just go for it. Scary right.

My latest idea in the planning stages (which will remain a secret for the moment) is a similar thing. I don’t think it will take off or amount to anything.

I’m lost. Left wondering the world unsure as to what I want to do when I grow up. Does anyone else get this? A sense of being lost and unsure.

I think of recently the only thing I have kept going is this blog and I’m still in the baby steps of this. Ideally I would love to get to a point where I can make this self-sufficient and make this my work and job.

One day hey.

Sorry for the rant / over sharing. But you know what they say. I’ll work it all out one day and it will be good.

Until then. Lets just smile and get on with it.

Peace ✌

21 thoughts on “Lost in Life.

  1. I feel the exact same! This is the only place I felt I belong but then realistically who wants to read about me?? πŸ˜‚ So then I crash back down to earth and get on with the usual boring crap πŸ˜‚ You are doing so well though you should be proud!!


  2. I can relate. For years I spent time looking for courses and jobs and feeling hopeless. Making plans that didn’t happen. Then I stopped and realised that the only thing I really wanted was the thing I’ve always wanted since I was a child. Now I focus on my writing and that makes me feel so much better. Hobbies are good and friends. You’re doing right not to dwell and letting things be until you can figure it out. I hope you do


  3. I definitely feel the same sometimes!! Especially when it comes to finding myself a job. It so ridiculously hard to find even a part time job as a student and it’s difficult to keep yourself motivated when it comes to looking for them. xx

    Liked by 1 person

  4. You’re definitely not alone in this mindset. For sure, I do the same! It’s dreadful when you want to do something so badly but your drive is like “meh, maybe not?” and you’re left feeling unmotivated or terrible about yourself. Whatever your latest project is – I hope you can get it done. If not, don’t worry so much about it! (:

    Liked by 1 person

  5. I totally feel you here, more as a recent thing for me. I used to have so much drive a couple of years back, I would have done literally anything to get to where I wanted with acting, and then I got knocked down a lot (long story), and I’m only now just getting back to it after a year out. I still doubt myself and struggle with getting back the motivation I had, but it’s there. I’ve had that lost feeling so much recently, that I really really get you. Totally here for support though, anytime. Blogvengers assemble!! Xx

    Liked by 1 person

    1. I am sorry to here you got knocked back. Another tale for another day. But I am glad you are back and at it. We got this. Lets make it work. Thank you. Got your back to sister. Blogvengers for life xx

      Liked by 1 person

  6. The fear of the unknown is certainly something that can hold us all back. Maybe it’s not about taking the plunge into the unknown but baby steps, like you said, little bit at a time. Remind yourself that you are talented and creative and have a lot to offer.

    Liked by 1 person

  7. I used to feel exactly the same! I was basically wondering through the forest of life without a clue where I was heading. And you know what, I still sort of am. The only difference now, though, is that my daughter is a guiding light.

    I know some of my ideas will never come to fruition, or won’t take off with others, but now I’ve decided to say β€œscrew it” and just try. Because one day, one idea will work, and it will help give my daughter a better life in the future.

    Liked by 2 people

  8. you must know this is relatable. maybe too much. I’m not that bad actually with executing my plans, but there are few of those that I keep postponing since 2010. and then I’m miserable about not doing anything and that makes me feel like not doing anything again and it’s a never-ending circle.
    I guess we’ll just have to wing it and try as much as we can. We’ll definitely accomplish something. And maybe we’ll find something great in the process πŸ™‚

    Liked by 1 person

  9. What a very honest and thought-provoking post. You did a lot of soul searching there. I don’t think how you feel is unusual. I’m not in my 20s ( not even close) and I still find myself looking for that Holy Grail of motivation that will spur me on to great things ! Haven’t found it yet. But keep going. I do like the supportiveness of the blogging world , everyone seems so kind, so maybe it’s good to offload here.

    Liked by 1 person

  10. Hey mate! I just came across your blog and really enjoy reading it. I just wanted to say, it sounds like you’ve done some really awesome stuff, but maybe thinking of it in terms of work kills the excitement for you? Or maybe you’ve given it a try and it’s genuinely run its course and it’s time to try something else? What if you just do it for the fun and learning?

    I reckon we give ourselves too much of a hard time when it comes to motivation and drive. Sure, you should set some goals and try things but in these days of information overload, you can still get a lot out of wandering aimlessly and enjoying the surprises that pop up along the way πŸ™‚

    Liked by 1 person

    1. Hey dude hope you are well.
      Mmm I can see that now you say it. You have a point.
      That is spund advise man. I think you are right. Its time to wander aimlessly for a bit and see what turns up.

      Glad you like the blog. Unsure how you found it but welcome none the less. ☺


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